The oldest biblical political principle; or, How I learned to stop worrying and love libertarianism

It can be so confusing to try to live as a Christian in today’s political climate.

We conservatives know that God is on our side. Every Bible verse that really matters supports us and condemns the liberals. But the occasional liberal (though liberals don’t really care about the Bible or even really know what’s in it) will try to confuse things by dragging out this or that passage from the Old Testament, as though obscure provisions under another dispensation—the Jubilee, or technical, time-bound Israelite social-welfare provisions pertaining to foreigners, widows, and orphans, or the Sermon on the Mount—had some kind of transhistorical permanency and were meant to tell us Christians how to act in the contemporary USA.

They start out sounding as though they really care about the Word of God, and you may not realize that they’re twisting Scripture until they get to the punch line and you see that the rabbit they have pulled out of their fancy pseudotheological hat is none other than straight-up Marxism.

If you were paying close attention, you could spot their hypocrisy earlier in the show from the fact that, while dredging out the plainly irrelevant provisions like those I mentioned above, they simultaneously write off as no longer binding the verses that God cares about the most, such as the ones forbidding homosexuality, premarital sex, and abortion, and requiring parents to give their daughters in marriage to their rapists and to stone rebellious teenagers to death at the city gates—not to mention the ones requiring the use of the Lord’s Prayer and the Pledge of Allegiance in public schools.

But I’m afraid some of you may be in danger of becoming a little confused by the fake complexities that the liberals introduce. They try to throw you off balance and obscure the clear Word of God with fancy terms like “hermeneutics,” which is really just a tactic, picked up from atheistic postmodern philosophy and taught in liberal seminaries, including many of the so-called evangelical seminaries, for turning the Bible liberal.

So I’m going to help you out here. Let’s go right back to the beginning, right back to the earliest chapters of Genesis, and find the fundamental principle of biblical politics and economics stated plainly and clearly. Once we get that basic principle established, we’re less likely to get confused and lose our way. It’s right there in plain sight in Genesis 4. Satan is tempting the firstborn son of Adam and Eve to found civilization on liberal principles, but he is decisively refuted—shot down in flames!— by a brilliant, laser-guided question that clearly establishes God’s preference for conservatism, libertarianism, small government, and laissez-faire capitalism:

“Am I my brother’s keeper?” (Genesis 4:9)

Clearly not!

We don’t need no stinking hermeneutics; we base our politics on the plain Word of God. Give me that old-time religion! It was good enough for Cain, and it’s good enough for me.

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